OBJECTIVES: The aim was to describe the existential life situations of spouses who care for persons with dementia, before and after relocation to nursing homes.

METHOD: This was a qualitative study among 11 spouses of persons with dementia, recruited via purposeful sampling. Data were collected through interviews and analysed with interpretive content analysis.

RESULTS: Before the relocation to nursing homes, the spouses' existential life situations were characterized by feelings of shame and guilt, being isolated in the home. Spouses were also exposed to psychological threats, physical violence, and had feelings of placing one's own needs last. After the relocation, spouses described feelings of guilt and freedom, living with grief and thoughts of death, feelings of loneliness in the spousal relationship, and striving for acceptance despite a lack of completion.

CONCLUSION: The existential life situation of spouses of persons with dementia is about being in limit situations which changes when the ill person relocates to a nursing home. This is important knowledge for health care staff to bear in mind at nursing homes when encountering spouses.